Is It Easy To Forgive?

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We always hear people advising us to forgive, let it go.. move on. I also passed through such situation where I thought, Is it really easy to overlook someone’s mistake? We all are a human being, and no one is perfect, we all make mistakes. We can quickly forget and forgive routine mistakes, we let go them as they don’t impact on our life or feelings for long but what if our feelings, trust got shattered? For me when it comes to emotions, it is tough! Can a word sorry heal all the pain and shattered feelings? No definitely not! Maybe, the person who is asking for forgiveness can feel serenity but not that person whom they bothered by their deeds. I usually ask myself what is the meaning of forgiveness? To say it’s ok or something more than that, after forgiving someone do we actually feel peace without any hard feelings?

Forgiveness is a healing process means releasing the anger, hatred, bitterness and negative feelings that we have been carrying around for someone. After forgiving them accept them with love, trust and move forward in life.

When my kid makes some mistake and says sorry, I forgive her, as I know there is no intention to give pain or bother anyone, but yeah I always teach her don’t use word ‘sorry’ as a weapon as one can tolerate your mistakes for once or twice not always. The meaning of sorry is not to repeat the same mistake. Don’t take word sorry for granted otherwise you will lose faith. How about us? Sometimes we make some mistakes repeatedly that hurts even the person whom we are hurting tries hard to give us wake-up call they try their best to stop us.  At that time we don’t think how it will impact on us or our beloved one, we leave our conscious behind. Our ego starts driving everything, One day when we realize what we were doing, we feel shame and ask for forgiveness. The person who is shattered say it’s ok as they don’t want us to feel the same pain, they don’t want to shatter us in the same way,  they don’t want to go in their deep memories those bitter memories still bother them.

Can we forgive ourselves? What about that guilt, pain which our consciousness is taking after realizing what we did? True, we can’t look into our eyes we can’t face that person. One of my friends asked me the same. I said repent is the best remedy in this situation. They looked me with surprise asked what? People always say don’t repent it gives disappointment, wasting time on the past and you are telling me to repent ? I said yes they are right at their place as if we are expressing repentance only by our words but not by our learning. It’s just wasting time over past and taking disappointments by lingering on the issue. The Pain of what happened is inevitable but to control that pain is only in our hands, by making our response similar to our feelings. Meet hatred with love.

When you hurt someone you apologize, but apologies can’t fulfill whatever they lost, their self-respect, shattered feelings most of all their trust, you may get forgiveness but not the same confidence. Whenever you confront that person they will always think can I count on this person the same way I did before, and it will remind them all the pain they tolerated. The pain runs deep inside the heart. Sorry, can’t remove scars. If you like to gain someone’s love and trust again, replace your ego with consciousness, make them happy with your behavior. A little smile on their face can change a lot, It will melt their anger and make them realize sorry is just not only a word for you it carries a lot. Their love, smile, and peace matters to you, your contentment. Every time you will see that person is smiling in front of you it will make you feel calm & fulfilling above all this little step will take us to their heart by passing through the bridge of trust!

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-Kranti

56 thoughts on “Is It Easy To Forgive?

  1. Preach! This was so good! Thank you! Forgiving is hard. But wow the hurt that is released when we choose to forgive even if the other person isn’t sorry. True freedom ❤️ Thank you for sharing! I’m hosting a blog party on August 3! Please join us and share you by dropping your link! And get to know other bloggers from around the world 🙂
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  2. I’ve always said, “forgive but never forget, that’s just setting yourself up for denial & disappointment”. Forgive & be careful, protect yourself, —so forgiveness isn’t repeated over & over & over. Ya know? I think it makes for better relationships all around. Thanks for your post!!

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  3. Forgiving and forgetting are two different things. Forgiving doesn’t mean overlooking a person’s offences. Mistakes can be easily forgiven, because if the actions were deliberate then they wouldn’t be called mistakes. When they are repeated however, then it’s an offence which was quite deliberate. There has to be rules of engagement to prevent repeated offences. If the person doesn’t comply with the rules, then keep your distance. Forgiveness is not, and should not be, the enabling bad behaviour. Forgiveness is to free yourself from the negative effects of other people’s actions. One should not remain in a toxic relationship in the name of forgiveness, nor should others demand forgiveness from us. Or dictate to us how and when we should forgive. Forgiveness is a process and sometimes have to be done in phases as healing progresses. So don’t despair if you still hurt, if and when you remember what was done, or see who did it, after you have forgiven. Be gentle and kind to yourself and allow healing to continue. Sometimes it may feel like you are reliving the experience. Don’t fight it — but don’t dwell on it, neither should you get lost in it — it’s still part of healing. It is well.

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    1. True, if someone repeats their mistakes they are no more mistakes it’s much better to call them offense. Forgiveness is a healing process it always takes time. This process should be done by heart not by force or demand to heal emotional wounds properly and deeply! Thank you so much for reading the post. 💛✨

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  4. As I age, and feel a bit more understanding of human development, I’m finding it easier to forgive, but for many I know it’s so difficult. I believe it’s essential for our own health and well being. A gift of forgiveness to others is a gift to ourselves.

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    1. definitely, it’s difficult if something is attached to feelings and emotions. Though we all know and understand it is necessary to forgive for our peace but this gift should not be taken for granted! 🙂

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  5. Forgiveness brings freedom from anger, but no, it does not erase what occurred, but it makes it easier to live one’s life. I could not wait for sorry, I had to forgive, to get my power back. But, I am quick to apologize now, because I realize that people need to hear sincere apologies sooner rather then later.

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    1. I agree we should take our power back by forgiving and it should be done with honest feelings! Thank you so much for your valuable comment! 💛✨

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  6. I agree with you.
    I think for the one who has been wronged, that it is easier to forget than forgive. Of course it depends on what it was, but if it’s something serious, it’s easier to forget.

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  7. Great post! Sometimes forgiveness is so difficult, especially with the repeat offenders. I loved this post and can feel your strength just by reading the words! I hope you have a great weekend and I am looking forward to more of your amazing posts!

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  8. Forgiveness is one of the greatest virtue in spirituality. And it’s always hard to be adopted. Loyal persons can forgive the mistakes as this is their nature…….
    However, there are some loyal and kind hearted people, who do not forgive the mistakes of too much evil persons. Because their “Sorry” isn’t enough and impossible to forget, when it is superficial. “Sorry” can’t be used as a weapon. Of course, everyone gets one chance more to prove himself. But……… ONLY ONE.
    I can remember when I did a mistake, a very serious mistake in a friendship. After that, I felt guilty and said sorry” to her. Two days later, she forgave me for my mistake and I got second chance luckily. But definitely, it is my last chance to keep the friendship alive. Though, she has forgiven me, but she can’t forget.
    I hope I’d make it through !
    Brilliant post with a great concept… 👍👍…

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